I Can Be Happy Alone

Well today I just feel so lazy. It seems like summer is here and I'm afraid I might not be consistent with school anymore. :/  I like being home alone. No one is there to talk to me. No one is there to insult me and bring my morals down.
I can be free within myself. Within a space so familiar, yet somehow unexplored.
I can sing out loud with my old J-pop & J-rock.

I can be happy alone.

There's a good chance I'll never be married because of that. I don't want to bring innocent children into this world, only to be abused and have their innocence destroyed to nothing.

I'll work and work, and save up money to build a house. I'll make a garden of wonderful flowers to hang dry. I'll save up again to build a workshop, and buy wood crafting tools and a sewing machine.
I'll buy string and beads, and craft wonderful little trinkets to sell and give as gifts.
I'll buy watercolour paints to use with my great-grandmother's easel.
Then I'll get a goat and some chickens... and definitely some cute little kittens.
I'll grow old with the animals and flowers, year after year.
Every Sunday I'll go to church,  and read my Bible every day.

No, I am never alone.
I flourish in the everlasting presence of God.
But the presence of people is uncomfortable.
Excuse me if you think that is antisocial and unhealthy.
It is not. It is better this way.
Maybe I won't cry as often, or think about self-harm as much.
I'll actually be healthier. Temptation will lessen.

The lusts of this world disgust me.
I would rather be alone in a free world of my own, thank you.
Not in my head, not as pretend; like now, when I'm surrounded by people.
That's unhealthy.
I would rather be alone and live my life happily.

Cheers to the introverts!